Texas Sayings

Texas sayings – though you may hear them elsewhere.

There are foods and more that are exclusively unique to Texas. And here I’d like to share with you some Texas sayings you should be aware of if you’re going to live here.

1. In Texas, we say “coke.” It doesn’t matter if you’re ordering Pepsi, Sprite, or any kind of soda.
2. “Bless your heart” has two meanings. It can really mean “bless you, sweetheart” or it can mean “f*ck you.” Listen to the inflections to know which one it is.
3. We’re not good with asking people to join us, we just say, “Y’all come here now.”
4. If you ever hear the term “all hat, no cattle” referring to yourself, the person you’re speaking with thinks you’re a pretentious ass. Just sayin’.

   And I’ve met my fair share of “all hat, no cattle” fools since I’ve moved here.

5. Look, if you’ve “been around the block”, and know what you’re doing, in Texas, it’s “This ain’t my first rodeo.”

   I sometimes say, “This ain’t my first BBQ” just to change it up.”

6.  If you hear “Git er done!” it meant to get that task finished, post haste.
7. I’ve never heard it personally, but apparently the United States is “that sketchy place outside Texas.” And now that I live here, I get it.
8. Texas do usually go to church before noon on Sunday… or what they like to call “the time we can’t buy beer.”
9. If you’re bein’ sketchy, and need watching, you’ll hear, “The eyes of Texas are upon you.” Apparently that’s worse than government wiretapping.
10. If you think something but aren’t sure, it’s not “I think” or “I guess” it’s “I reckon.”
11. Texans don’t call it “the death penalty”… they say “killing you back.”
12. “Time to pain your ass white and run with the antelope” means you’d best shut your mouth and do as you’re told.
13. “I smell what you’re stepping in” doesn’t mean you need to look at the sole of your boots, it just means the person gets what you’re saying.
14. “Come hell or high water” isn’t unique to Texas, but it sure means it’s gonna get done.
15. “Uglier ‘n sin” may not be said to your face, but it’s uglier than ugly.
16. If you “just fell off the turnip truck” you’re not the brightest bulb in the bunch, which is to say, not very smart.
17. A little nervous about something? Maybe a lot nervous? Are you “sweatin’ like a whore in church?”
18. If “you can hang your hat on it” you know it’s reliable and trustworthy.
19. “My dog wouldn’t bite a biscuit” means the dog ain’t nothing to worry ‘about.
20. Make sure you understand these terms so native Texans don’t think you’re “dumber than a box of rocks.”
21. If someone is amused, or learned something crazy, she might say, “Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit.”

These are just a few of the fun sayings you’ll hear in Texas. If you have any others you’d like to contribute, please add a comment. I love hearing from you.